Product Review: Malt-O-Meal Chocolate Frosted Mini Toasters
Mmmm, Malt-O-Meal…is there anything that says college breakfast in a small, wholesome recreation town like you? Whether it’s Cinnamon Toasters or Tootie Fruities, you’ve been dishing out less packaging and bigger savings for years. But do you taste as good as the genuine article?
Ok, so the rumors are true. I’ve replaced pretty much every carbohydrate previously in my diet in favor of cereal, and don’t think for a moment that I’m regretting it. Maybe it’s misplaced, but I’ve endeavored on a one-man mission to consume every cereal on the market. So even though I had a boxes of Waffle Crisp, Reese’s Puffs, and Honey Nut Chex in my room (all solid choices) there was no stopping me from laying down an Abraham Lincoln at Dollar General last week, especially when confronted with the Malt-O-Meal’s new Chocolate Frosted Mini Spooners.
Hunky, happy spoonfuls of whole grain cereal, woven into a delicious, fortifying frosted squares drizzled with decadent ribbons of chocolate delight.
First off, points for the four serving box at only a buck. Not great unit per once price, but at least this lets you test out cereals on the cheap, and even makes it somewhat excusable to eat and entire box (hey, that’s less calories than most fast food combo meals!) Malt-O-Meal, 0f course, is famous as the cheap knockoff brand of cereals, but truth be told I’m a fan of some of their offerings, and I’ve always been obsessed about trying their chocolate flavored cereals. I mean, they’ve got a chocolate version of Frosted Flakes and Lucky Charms, and once more, they’re not impossible to find. Considering it’s been far too long since one of my favorites, Kelloggs’ Frosted Mini Wheats Little Bits Chocolate, has been on sale, I couldn’t wait to find a cheap substitute.
Well I’m still looking, because these are major fail, and Exhibit A for why some non-brand name foods just really don’t live up to the real McCoy. Out of the box initially, it looks great – they’re thick and wheaty, and they’re covered with a thick vanilla and brown coating. Notice how I said brown. Why, you ask? Well, take a look at the ingredients:
How in the world do you propose to fabricate something of “chocolate delight” when there is a complete lack of anything cocoa related in your product formula? For comparisons sake, have a peak at Kelloggs’ Little Bits Chocolate recipe:
WHOLE GRAIN WHEAT, SUGAR, SEMI-SWEET CHOCOLATE CHIPS (SUGAR, CHOCOLATE, COCOA BUTTER, SOY LECITHIN, VANILLA EXTRACT), COCOA (PROCESSED WITH ALKALI), SALT, ARTIFICIAL FLAVOR, GELATIN, SORBITOL, REDUCED IRON, NIACINAMIDE, PYRIDOXINE HYDROCHLORIDE (VITAMIN B6), RIBOFLAVIN (VITAMIN B2), THIAMIN HYDROCHLORIDE (VITAMIN B1), FOLIC ACID, ZINC OXIDE, VITAMIN B12. TO MAINTAIN QUALITY, BHT HAS BEEN ADDED TO THE PACKAGING.
That’s chocolate goodness right there, complete with a full gram of saturated fat per serving. But Malt-O-Meal’s formula comes nowhere close, and it shows in taste. It’s more hardened and stale vanilla than anything else, with a hint of chocolate flavor. That’s out of the drink. Once in milk, you’re left with a decent tasting melted marshmallow crust, but it’s short lived and overwhelmed by the wheaty underside, which dominates every bite. There is no overwhelming flavor of cocoa, and no secondary flavor of richness either. Once more, it doesn’t even leave sugary end milk, and I am totally put off by the prospect of eating bland, firehouse cereal in bland, fat free milk. My God, what am I, a healthy eater?
This has got to be one of the biggest disappointments of cereal production in human history. Maybe my expectations were much too high, but maybe not. I’ve found Malt-O-Meal’s version of Cocoa Puffs to be bland, stale, and artificial tasting, and can honestly say Chocolate frosted Mini Toasters fall at the very bottom of the chocolate cereal spectrum. This really annoys me, since I was all ready to spring for some chocolate Frosted Flakes the other day, but ended up reconsidering. Maybe I should just buy regular Kelloggs’ frosted flakes and eat them with chocolate milk?
Pros: Very favorable sugar to fiber to protein ration for a sweet cereal. Only blowing a dollar because of small box. Theoretically being able to down an entire cereal box while consuming less sugar than a smoothie. Whole grains. Anyone out there like mallows?
Cons: One of the worst tasting chocolate cereals on the market. Stale. Not very sweet. Overly wheaty surface area. Gives the Dollar Store a bad name. Better Than: Anything with no sugar. Not as Good As: Virtually every chocolate cereal ever.
Price: 1.00 (on sale at Fresh Market)
Overall GrubGrade: 4.25 (Poor)
More Info: BearRiverValleyCereal.com
Total Fat: 1g
Saturated Fat: 0g
Total Carbs: 45g